Sunday, April 27, 2008

Mr Spoon

Last night I slept for twelve hours. I only woke up once. At that time I asked The Man, urgently,

"Is it Saturday? Can I sleep more?"

"Yes," he said, and he may have said more but I did not hear it. I was asleep again already, dreaming.

I dreamed that I met a spoon with the head of a man. He had a very tidy haircut, and his face was long, white and sad. Also, he had an extremely long neck. In fact, that was all he had, because he was a spoon.

"Help me!" he wailed, and big tears trickled down his face. "Please! Help me! I want to pee!"

But I did not help him because I had been told, or maybe just knew (in the way you know things in dreams) that it was a trick. He was dangerous. He continued to cry for help and I carried on, along with everybody else. There were a lot of people.

It was a postmodern dream. I know that because somebody in the dream told me so.

"So this is what the future is like," I remember thinking. My sleeping brain interpreted the word 'postmodern' very literally.

When I woke up Mr Spoon was still vivid in my mind, but the rest of the dream faded rapidly. I laughed at the idea of a spoon with a man's head. How silly! I thought. How utterly bizarre! But he also made me feel a little anxious. What was so dangerous about him? Why couldn't I help him?

And what was all THAT about?

5 comments:

Hebron said...

Those are dangerous questions, my lady! You should not have them, lest you wish to end up like the Dish!
Remember what happened to him? He listened to the Spoon's lies and was never heard from again!

Just let him go. It's for the best.

Cheryl said...

I'm glad you didn't help him. He sounds like a stirrer.

Anonymous said...

Dont try to help the spoon. That is impossible. You have to understand ..... there is no spoon.

Badaunt said...

Hebron: Mr Spoon was looking for a dish to run away with? I hadn't thought of that. (Perhaps because there is nothing dishy about me.:-)

Cheryl: May I groan? (Good one!)

Anon: I am feeling very sleeeepy ....

Radioactive Jam said...

Maybe he was really saying he wanted a toupee, but his way-extended neck made the 'ee' sound too long.