Friday, November 12, 2004


I have come to the conclusion that my head is just too heavy. It's all those brains in there, weighing me down. That's why my neck hurts so much.

My acupuncturist tries to tell me that it is the humidity, which has still not gone away (it's supposed to, tomorrow) although the weather has become much cooler. This is meant to be one of the dry months, but it hasn't been, so far. But I reckon it's my brains. Clever, clever me.

Also, ouch. And in case you weren't paying attention the last time I wrote this (if I did actually write this - I can't remember, perhaps due to a bang on the head): Never, ever let yourself get a bang on the head. It messes up your neck forever.

That's my advice for the day. Avoid accidents. Also, don't be too clever.

I was too clever today, when I decided to borrow my Iranian friend's joke. I found myself in a lift with two Americans and a Pom. (This sounds like the beginning of a joke, doesn't it? It is. It's the beginning of a failed joke.) I hadn't seen any of them for two weeks, so it seemed like a good opportunity.

"Congratulations on your newly re-elected President!" I said, brightly.

Everybody stared at me. The silence stretched. The doors went ping! and closed. A atmosphere of deep gloom would have descended except that we were going up, so in fact the atmosphere of deep gloom ascended. Then the Pom said, gently,

"Well, Badaunt, that wasn't very kind."

"Sorry," I said, humbly. "It was supposed to be funny."

"Ha ha," said one of the Americans, heavily. They both looked infinitely depressed. The doors went ping again and we exited. The Americans stomped off, and I mentally apologised to their students.

I should have known that overworked teachers would not appreciate a joke like that on a Friday morning, especially after they've been forced to try to explain the inexplicable all week to baffled students. I wasn't thinking straight, and my neck hurt.

It's been a long week.