Yesterday morning I made the mistake of expressing my horror to The Man about the spare tyre I am developing around my middle.
"I've never had this before," I said, grabbing a handful to show him.
He stared, aghast. Then he kindly pointed out that it is the beginning of semester, and I always lose weight as semester goes on. This is true, but still, I don't like it much. Is this middle-age spread?
Last night, after I came home, he teased me about it, patting my tummy.
"You've been eating too many hy- hybo- hybocar- ..."
"HYBOCARDRATES!" I shouted gleefully, and had to duck.
Then he looked horrified as it dawned on him that he had just said something bloggable and the whole world would get to hear it and laugh. (Well, at least the fraction of the whole world that reads this.) Also, he will never be able to tease me about my tummy again, because whenever he does I will promise solemnly not to eat so many hybocardrates.
We're even.
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- Badaunt
- I'm from NZ, and now live in Japan, teaching English to reluctant university students. Email me: badaunt at gmail.com
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Links for language teachers
I have noticed that I get a lot of hits from people searching "present simple" and "ESL," and assume that this is language teachers looking for ideas or lesson plans. The following links are good places to start.
ESL Lounge Here you will find lesson plans organised by level. A fantastically useful site for busy teachers, and easy to navigate.
British Council Here lesson plans are organized by topic. There are more teaching activities in the 'downloads' section.
The Internet TESL Journal
They have not updated this page for a while, but there is still a lot you might find useful.
Humanising Language Teaching
This is an online journal, good for ideas, inspiration, and especially good towards the end of semester when you're feeling not quite human.
Dave's ESL Cafe
Almost too much to wade through, but a very useful resource. Lots of links to other sources.
Karin's ESL PartyLand
This is a page specifically dealing with teaching simple present and present progressive. I have not tried any of these, but there are a lot of ideas here, and they look good. At the very least you will be inspired.
Good luck!
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8 comments:
:) That's cute.
I think he's right. I'm gonna cut down on my hybocardrates, as well.
There aren't any of those in coffee are there?
You say tyre, I say tire. Your spelling makes me think of English literature. Mine makes me think of the eye sores floating down polluted rivers. Just had to share that.
There are tears forming in my eyes. I must go now; time to shop for a hybocardrate based midday meal.
he he :)
Thanks for the laugh at the end of a tiring day!
Now I can't work out how to say it properly.
I used to know a small boy who called the things over your eyes "owbreyes".
Muahahaha... Serves him right. :)
It took me at least 15 minutes to work out what was wrong!
Wikkachicky: If I call him 'cute', he hits me. Good thing you're on the other side of the world.
WriterMom: I have been here so long teaching from American textbooks that half the time I don't know which spelling convention I'm using. It's good to know I got one right!
RaJ: I knew you would appreciate this one.Harbocydrates just seemed RIGHT for you, I felt.
Meegan: My Man is astounding. He makes funny jokes in ANY language, even when he doesn't mean to!
Potentilla & Ms Mac: I told a couple of colleagues about this, and when I finished my story my punchline left them cold. They just stared at me. They didn't even notice.
I think that's why it was such a good one.
(Netscape Nagivator was easier to spot, but harder to stop yourself from using, I discovered.)
And I LOVE owbreyes.I don't think I've ever heard of a Spoonerism that uses vowels before. Lovely!
Kevin: It DOES.
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